Highway 20 Ride: Thoughts on the challenges of parenting alone

4.20.2013 @ 10:47 am

Some of my favorite people are parents who are parenting alone – those that face the daily challenge to meet the needs of their children, provide for their family, and nurture even a sliver of a personal life cause me to pray for them, their children, and cheer them on in any small way I can.

Why? Well, the “parenting alone gig”  is personal to me – my Mom managed to pull off this difficult assignment with wisdom, grace, and Midwestern tenacity.  So much so that I didn’t really think of myself as having come from a single parent home – and yet that was my reality. And yes, I did miss having a dad in my life – lots of guy “wisdom” questions that should have been answered from his wisdom were instead left to the collective foolishness of the maturity pygmies at the bowling alley I hung out at!

The song I’ve linked to this blog, Highway 20 Ride, is a single dad’s poignant reflections to his son – how he hopes his son doesn’t hate him and how difficult it must be for his boy to understand that sometimes parents just can’t get along.  And so, this dad makes the drive every other week, to spend precious time with a boy who will grow up much too quickly – and miss out on the daily touches of his father.  If there is a touch point verse for dads in this circumstance, it might be Colossians 3:21: “Fathers, do not exasperate (make your children resentful) that they may not lose heart – become discouraged.”

And so, IF you are a single dad, make every effort to stay invested in the daily lives of your kids. Single mom – if possible, build bridges rather than dams in terms of making opportunities for your children to be with their dad – I know there are LOTS of reasons and circumstances…..and yet again, work together if you possibly can. Lastly, if your marriage is hanging by a thread, and there are kids involved, think about the reality of the Highway 20 Ride…..and ask the Lord for wisdom to do what is right.

p.s. – the song was written by a dad who was struggling with this reality in his life.

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Larry Shoemaker – Pastor of Marriage & Family
(909) 335-7333, x 135 | lshoemaker@trinityonline.org

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